Near the cross of Jesus stood his mother, his mother’s sister, Mary the wife of Clopas, and Mary Magdalene. When Jesus saw his mother there, and the disciple whom he loved standing near by, he said to her, ‘Woman, here is your son,’ and to the disciple, ‘Here is your mother.’ From that time on, this disciple took her into his home.
John 19:25-27 NIVUK
In all of the Bible, and perhaps in history, it is difficult to find an act of love as wonderful as this, except the cross itself. These are three verses that are easily skipped over, but they are incredibly powerful. As we explore them, we will see the depth of Jesus’ love for His mother and the closest of His disciples.
To properly understand this text, we must understand the characters and their situation.
Mary, Jesus’ mother, was likely around 45-47 years old, if we assume that she was around 12-14 years old when she became pregnant with Jesus. So, by our standards, not old. However, average life expectancy in those days would be around 55 years old.
Many theologians believe that her husband, Joseph, was likely dead as we hear nothing from him or about him after Jesus is found in the Temple as a boy.
So, as she watches the life slowly drain from the body of her oldest son, Mary is a widow.
We don’t know the ages of Jesus’ brothers (although they would likely be in their twenties at least) and if they were able to fulfil their responsibilities to provide for her. What we do know is that Jesus’ death would make it impossible for Him to fulfil His responsibilities towards her as the oldest son.
What we know about John is that he was the youngest of the Apostles. John is ‘the disciple Jesus loved’ in this verse.
Some theologians believe that his mother was with him as he watched Jesus perish on the cross. They say this because of Matthew 27:55-56. At any rate, what we can say is that his mother was still alive.
John was one of the ‘sons of thunder’ – almost like a teenage gang formed of him and his older brothers Peter and James (Mark 3:16-17). Peter certainly lived up to this name with his constantly outspoken and impetuous nature. John, however, was more circumspect and affectionate – even leaning on Jesus during the Last Supper (John 13:22-25). He is clearly the more sensitive of the brothers, as his three letters show.
So we have a mother and boy, whom Jesus brings together.
To understand the full force and impact of these verses, we must try to understand Jesus’ situation here.
John places this narrative relatively close to the end of Jesus’ earthly life. At this point, He is experiencing a level of physical pain that none of us will ever have to endure. It is extreme in every possible way.
He is pinned to a vertical wooden cross – not nicely planed planks of wood, but more likely roughly cut tree trunks – by metal spikes in His hands and feet.
His back has been torn to ribbons by a cat-o-nine-tails, and is nothing more than a mess of ripped and bleeding flesh.
His head is a mess of blood from the thorny crown banged into it by cruel and heartless soldiers.
Every time He tries to do something as simple as breathing, He has to pull himself up, rubbing his back wounds against the roughly hewn wood, and lean into the wounds on the four spikes.
The pain would have beyond excruciating. Not just for one breath, but every breath.
I'm sure you’ve noticed, but every time we talk, we inhale, and then exhale air over our vocal chords.
Do you see the implications of this? These words would have been agony. Every syllable would have made His situation worse. Hence their brevity.
Yet there and then, in the midst of unimaginable pain, Jesus makes His earthly mother and His youngest apostle His priority.
Extraordinary.
The wonderful thing is that this not at all out of character for Jesus. The reality is, as we have seen, that Jesus chose to go to cross. It wasn’t an unavoidable tragedy. Jesus could have stopped it at any moment from His temptation onwards, but made a conscious choice not to do so.
Why?
Because of love. For us.
Follow God’s example, therefore, as dearly loved children and live a life of love, just as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us as a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God.
Ephesians 5:1-2 NIVUK
Jesus Himself taught this:
Greater love has no-one than this: to lay down one’s life for one’s friends.
John 15:13 NIVUK
Yet Jesus went even further and laid down His life for sinners – His enemies:
You see, at just the right time, when we were still powerless, Christ died for the ungodly. Very rarely will anyone die for a righteous person, though for a good person someone might possibly dare to die. But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.
Romans 5:6-8 NIVUK
This whole event might leave our mouths gaping at how anyone could be so selfless, but the reality is that it's actually typical for Jesus.
This is why Paul writes these words to the church in Philippi, which was troubled by personality issues:
Therefore if you have any encouragement from being united with Christ, if any comfort from his love, if any common sharing in the Spirit, if any tenderness and compassion, then make my joy complete by being like-minded, having the same love, being one in spirit and of one mind. Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves, not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of the others.
Philippians 2:1-4 NIVUK
https://bible.com/bible/113/php.2.1-4.NIVUK
He wants them to have the same mindset as Jesus, the same attitude and thinking as Him.
And what is that mindset?
Love. A love that gives rise to utter selflessness. As Paul told the Corinthians, love is not self-seeking (1 Corinthians 13:5).
I have worked in the corporate world, where we are encouraged to battle and best each other as if it was a fight to the death for a meagre bonus that is mostly gobbled up by taxes. It was, and is, utterly pathetic.
That is not how anyone seeking to follow Jesus Christ should ever behave.
We are called to live a life of love (Ephesians 5:2): love for God and for our fellow human being (Matthew 22:37-40; Mark 12:30-31), a love exemplified in every way by Jesus Christ Himself.
John became known as the Apostle of Love due to his extensive writing on the subject. I wonder if that was inspired by this single event, when the dying Christ, in pain beyond imagination, put His own needs last and sought to care for His earthly mother and youngest apostle.
This picture may be stunning and heartwarming, but it also comes with a stern challenge.
Because, if you call yourself a Christian, you must go and do likewise.
Questions
1. What, to you, is so special about this event?
2. Why do you think Jesus expended so much effort to say these words? What does it say about His priorities?
3. How can you ‘live a life of love’ and follow His example?
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