The Love Principle - Study 32: Love as Restoration

John 21:15-22 NIV 

[15] When they had finished eating, Jesus said to Simon Peter, “Simon son of John, do you love me more than these?” “Yes, Lord,” he said, “you know that I love you.” Jesus said, “Feed my lambs.” [16] Again Jesus said, “Simon son of John, do you love me?” He answered, “Yes, Lord, you know that I love you.” Jesus said, “Take care of my sheep.” [17] The third time he said to him, “Simon son of John, do you love me?” Peter was hurt because Jesus asked him the third time, “Do you love me?” He said, “Lord, you know all things; you know that I love you.” Jesus said, “Feed my sheep. [18] Very truly I tell you, when you were younger you dressed yourself and went where you wanted; but when you are old you will stretch out your hands, and someone else will dress you and lead you where you do not want to go.” [19] Jesus said this to indicate the kind of death by which Peter would glorify God. Then he said to him, “Follow me!” [20] Peter turned and saw that the disciple whom Jesus loved was following them. (This was the one who had leaned back against Jesus at the supper and had said, “Lord, who is going to betray you?”) [21] When Peter saw him, he asked, “Lord, what about him?” [22] Jesus answered, “If I want him to remain alive until I return, what is that to you? You must follow me.”  

(Read the full passage at: https://bible.com/bible/111/jhn.21.15-22.NIV)

Way back when I was in my fifth year of high school, I received information that really set me back. I had been waiting on my exam results to see if I could get into university. In those days, they were posted first in the windows of the school before our certificates were sent out by mail. I knew what I needed to get. The university had been clear with me. So I ran to the school as soon as they were due to be published to see my grades. 

That’s when I received the setback: my grades were not enough. My marks for Physics and Maths were not high enough. 

I was disappointed, but not upset. I had hoped that my sixth year of high school would be a breeze, with not too much stress, and then I would coast into university. That would not now be the case. 

I would have to work. 

And work I did. Hard. 

But after another year of hard work, my grades were still not high enough. 

So that summer I went to summer school. And I worked. Hard.  

They eventually let me in. Maybe it was because of my sheer implacable persistence. But I got in. 

I had failed. Twice. But I worked hard to make it up. 

This is how people see sin and failure. They might have done wrong. They might have crossed the line. They may have shown hatred instead of love. But they can put it right. A few charitable donations. Maybe sponsor a few missionaries. Go to church a bit more often. Carry out a few rituals. It will all be fine. 

Right? 

Wrong! 

The Bible covers this in quite uncompromising style: 

Romans 3:10-18 NIV 

[10] As it is written: “There is no one righteous, not even one; [11] there is no one who understands; there is no one who seeks God. [12] All have turned away, they have together become worthless; there is no one who does good, not even one.” [13] “Their throats are open graves; their tongues practice deceit.” “The poison of vipers is on their lips.” [14] “Their mouths are full of cursing and bitterness.” [15] “Their feet are swift to shed blood; [16] ruin and misery mark their ways, [17] and the way of peace they do not know.” [18] “There is no fear of God before their eyes.” 

(Read the full passage at: https://bible.com/bible/111/rom.3.10-18.NIV)

Romans 3:23 NIV 

[23] for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God 

(Read the full passage at: https://bible.com/bible/111/rom.3.23.NIV)

Sin is the greatest leveller mankind has ever known. We have all sinned. We are all unable to save ourselves. Like the picture we explored in a previous study of a sheep on its back, the Gospel teaches that we are in deep trouble, having failed God’s standards, and are utterly unable to stand up and turn it around. 

And what is God’s standard? At its heart, that standard is love. 1 Corinthians 13 love. Agape love. Love at its purest and highest and deepest. A love that is not romantic – we might wish that it was, because if it was, it would be easier – but a love that lays waste to any notion of self-righteousness or vain glory, but humbles us, bringing us to our knees and making us realise just how far from God we really are. 

Sometimes an operation is necessary for our health, but still leads us in pain. The extraction of the arrogance tumour is one such operation. It hurts. It hurts really badly. We might look at the command to love and the definition of love and realise how painfully far short of it we are. 

If, after thirty-one studies on the subject, that is where you are, then this final study in this series is for you. 

We are looking at a man who failed to love. His failure was bad. In fact, it was bordering on catastrophic. He didn’t just say he didn’t love Jesus, he denied ever having known him: not just once, but three times. In public. Within a short distance of where Jesus was on trial for His life. 

Yet in the bitter sting of dramatic and calamitous failure, we see a gentle Saviour who sought to restore Peter back to the fold: 

Mark 16:1-7 NIV 

[1] When the Sabbath was over, Mary Magdalene, Mary the mother of James, and Salome bought spices so that they might go to anoint Jesus’ body. [2] Very early on the first day of the week, just after sunrise, they were on their way to the tomb [3] and they asked each other, “Who will roll the stone away from the entrance of the tomb?” [4] But when they looked up, they saw that the stone, which was very large, had been rolled away. [5] As they entered the tomb, they saw a young man dressed in a white robe sitting on the right side, and they were alarmed. [6] “Don’t be alarmed,” he said. “You are looking for Jesus the Nazarene, who was crucified. He has risen! He is not here. See the place where they laid him. [7] But go, tell his disciples and Peter, ‘He is going ahead of you into Galilee. There you will see him, just as he told you.’ ” 

(Read the full passage at: https://bible.com/bible/111/mrk.16.1-7.NIV)

Do you see the incredible kindness of the Saviour here in the words of the angel here? ‘Go tell my disciples... and Peter’. 

That is so very precious. 

What we are looking at in the Gospel of John is how Peter was restored to the apostles. This is a well-known and well-taught passage.  

However, I want to take a slightly different approach. I want us to notice how Jesus sought to restore Peter's relationships, and the pattern we see unfolding in these verses, because here we see an echo of what we have been learning throughout the past thirty-one studies.  

And it is beautiful. 

Let’s look, then at The First Love. 

The First Love 

John 21:15 NIV 

[15] When they had finished eating, Jesus said to Simon Peter, “Simon son of John, do you love me more than these?” “Yes, Lord,” he said, “you know that I love you.” Jesus said, “Feed my lambs.” 

(Read the full passage at: https://bible.com/bible/111/jhn.21.15.NIV).

Declarations of love are important. They provide us with firm assurance that we are not alone. 

Now, by this I don’t mean the grandstanding displays with red roses and skywriting and jumbotron screens. They can easily be manipulative. 

No, I mean a simple, banal, everyday reminder that you love someone. 

I try to do this every day. There is a very good reason. In 2001, I lost my father to Non-Hodgkins Lymphoma. When I came home from Romania to see him pass to be with His Lord, he was already in hospital. He had only been there for just two weeks when he died.

At that moment, I made a resolution: I would not let any member of my family leave the house each day without knowing that I loved them, because that sad moment reminded me just how quickly tragedy can strike. 

Tragedy had already struck for Peter. He had denied Jesus three times in such a catastrophic way that he had sunk into a pit of deep sorrow (Luke 22:54-62). Having sunk so low, I’m sure many of us would have had severe doubts about having such a man in our team and on our side. 

Not Jesus.

Luke 24:33-34 NIV 

[33] They got up and returned at once to Jerusalem. There they found the Eleven and those with them, assembled together [34] and saying, “It is true! The Lord has risen and has appeared to Simon.”  

(Read the full passage at: https://bible.com/bible/111/luk.24.33-34.NIV)

Do you see this? Not only did Jesus send a specific message for Peter, but He specifically appeared, privately, to Peter. 

And now, by the side of the lake, where Peter has gone fishing with his friends and seemingly failed at even that, Jesus replayed the miracle He performed when Peter was called the first time (Luke 5:1-11; John 21:1-14). 

In act of mercy so beautiful that words fail to fully describe it, Jesus was restoring a man who failed him badly. 

What a Saviour! 

But look at the question He asked Peter. Three times He asked Peter the same thing: ‘Do you love me?’ Three times for three denials. 

But look how it progresses: 

John 21:15 NIV 

[15] When they had finished eating, Jesus said to Simon Peter, “Simon son of John, do you love me more than these?” “Yes, Lord,” he said, “you know that I love you.” Jesus said, “Feed my lambs.” 

(Read the full passage at: https://bible.com/bible/111/jhn.21.15.NIV)

The ‘more than these’ part of this is very interesting. Peter had earlier declared this: 

Matthew 26:33 NIV 

[33] Peter replied, “Even if all fall away on account of you, I never will.” 

(Read the full passage at: https://bible.com/bible/111/mat.26.33.NIV)

Peter clearly believed that he loved Jesus more than anyone else and would stand by Jesus even if no-one else did. 

Those words did not age well. 

Some also believe that Jesus was pointing at his fishing boat and equipment when He said this. There is no hard evidence in Scripture that this was the case. However, he was called from fishing, and was being re-called from fishing, so it isn’t impossible. 

Ultimately, Peter was being questioned about his level of affection for and attachment to Jesus. He was being asked, effectively, if he loved God. 

Peter replied that he loved Jesus.  

However, there is a subtle change in tone between the question and the answer. Peter was asked if he ‘agape’d Jesus. His response was not in kind. He said that he ‘phileos’ed Jesus.  

Jesus was asking Peter if he loved Him; Peter replied that Jesus was his mate, his pal, his bro, his homey, his amigo. 

Not the same thing. Not at all. 

Jesus asked the same thing. Peter gave Him the same answer. 

And then there is a subtle, but dramatic, change in tone. Jesus did not ask Peter if he ‘agape’d Jesus, but if he ‘phileo'd Jesus: not if he loved Jesus, but if Jesus was his friend. 

That third question is so telling. Jesus descended to Peter’s level. Peter, the man who had spoken so very rashly and had not been able to back up his words with action, has seemingly been humbled. He could tell Jesus that he ‘agape’s Him because, in truth, he did not. Not yet. 

But, in a moment of grace-filled condescension, after performing again the miracle that changed Peter’s life, Jesus met Peter where He was and accepted his fumbling affection. 

And then He told this failed, fumbling disciple to follow Him. 

Peter is restored, through the same patient, kind, non-judgemental love we see described in 1 Corinthians 13. 

And that is just so beautiful. 

As we set out on this long but amazing journey, time and time again in Scripture we have been challenged by what it truly means to love God, our neighbours and ourselves. It is indeed a high standard, and one which none of us ever quite reach. That can depress us. We do our best, but our best is somehow never quite enough. 

And then we see these verses. We see how Jesus gently restored His failed disciple and we are reminded of this prophecy: 

Isaiah 42:1-4 NIV 

[1] “Here is my servant, whom I uphold, my chosen one in whom I delight; I will put my Spirit on him, and he will bring justice to the nations. [2] He will not shout or cry out, or raise his voice in the streets. [3] A bruised reed he will not break, and a smoldering wick he will not snuff out. In faithfulness he will bring forth justice; [4] he will not falter or be discouraged till he establishes justice on earth. In his teaching the islands will put their hope.” 

(Read the full passage at: https://bible.com/bible/111/isa.42.1-4.NIV)

If that is how you feel, if these challenging studies on love have left you bruised and broken, then look to Peter. He was restored by love to love. 

It can happen to you too. 

If you take the decision today to love Jesus with all your heart, soul, mind and strength. 

So the first love was is to love God. We now move on to The Second Love. 

The Second Love 

John 21:15-17 NIV 

[15] When they had finished eating, Jesus said to Simon Peter, “Simon son of John, do you love me more than these?” “Yes, Lord,” he said, “you know that I love you.” Jesus said, “Feed my lambs.” [16] Again Jesus said, “Simon son of John, do you love me?” He answered, “Yes, Lord, you know that I love you.” Jesus said, “Take care of my sheep.” [17] The third time he said to him, “Simon son of John, do you love me?” Peter was hurt because Jesus asked him the third time, “Do you love me?” He said, “Lord, you know all things; you know that I love you.” Jesus said, “Feed my sheep.  

(Read the full passage at: https://bible.com/bible/111/jhn.21.15-17.NIV)

When you hire a tradesman to do some work in your house, it’s important that you hire someone with the appropriate skills. You wouldn’t hire a bricklayer to tile your bathroom, or an electrician to fix your gas central heating, or an air conditioning repairman to rewire your house. 

You hire the right man for the right job. 

Which is why, on the surface, this seems like a strange thing to get Peter to do. Peter was a fisherman, not a shepherd. What would he do: throw a net over them, count them and then try to fillet them? 

It doesn’t seem to make sense. 

Until we realise the double-meaning of sheep and lambs, as we saw in John 10:1-18. 

Jesus was appointing Peter to be an under-shepherd of His flock, His followers. He was to do so in the footsteps of the Good Shepherd, and would appoint other shepherds to the task (1 Peter 5:1-4). Peter was to love the flock and serve it even if it would cause his own demise (John 21:18-19). He was to give his life for the sheep. 

He was being commanded again to love his neighbour. 

Now, I’m sure we realise that not many of us are called to serve like Peter did. That much is sure. 

However, a key act of repentance when we have gone astray is to love and serve other people and to learn and apply the principle of submission in our relationships (Ephesians 5:21). This is not ‘natural’ behaviour and is concrete proof that we have changed. 

So we have seen, then, how Peter’s restoration involved loving God again and loving his neighbours – specifically his Christian neighbours. 

We now move on to a short vignette that teaches us how he was told to obey The Third Love. 

The Third Love 

John 21:20-22 NIV 

[20] Peter turned and saw that the disciple whom Jesus loved was following them. (This was the one who had leaned back against Jesus at the supper and had said, “Lord, who is going to betray you?”) [21] When Peter saw him, he asked, “Lord, what about him?” [22] Jesus answered, “If I want him to remain alive until I return, what is that to you? You must follow me.”  

(Read the full passage at: https://bible.com/bible/111/jhn.21.20-22.NIV)

It is almost universally recognised that too much social media use is harmful. 

Now, before I tell you this, you have to understand that I am not on the payroll of any social media company, and I definitely do not exempt them from responsibility for what they allow on their platforms.

However, most of the damage done on social media is not the fault of the algorithms or the design or anything like that. Most of the damage is entirely down to human nature. It’s human nature that bullies, belittles and destroys those it perceives as weaker. It’s human beings who post contemptible content and try to claim that they have a human right to do so. 

But for most of us, it’s also human nature that sees what someone else has, even if their content is highly curated, and becomes envious. Or worse, posts content with the deliberate aim of making someone else envious so that we feel validated. 

That is really pathetic. 

These two verses contain a tiny, but very telling, snippet of a conversation. To read it in its full context, the disciples appear to have debated on at least three occasions which of them is the greatest, including, rather insensitively, at the Last Supper when Jesus announced His death and resurrection (Mark 9:30-37; Luke 9:46-48). John was also especially close to Jesus, and Peter seems to have been a bit envious of this, as we see even at the Last Supper (John 13:21-25). 

Here, by the side of Lake Galilee, Jesus had told Peter that he would die in later life because of His commitment to follow Jesus. Peter then became curious as to what would happen to John, as if Peter was somehow being treated harshly and John was being treated favourably. 

Jesus response is a word we all need to hear: 

John 21:22 NIV 

[22] Jesus answered, “If I want him to remain alive until I return, what is that to you? You must follow me.”  

(Read the full passage at: https://bible.com/bible/111/jhn.21.22.NIV)

Jesus basically told Peter that what would happen to John was none of his business, and that instead he should concentrate on following Jesus for himself. 

There are fewer more damaging things to our mental, emotional and spiritual health than constantly comparing our lives with other people. It’s not like comparing apples with pears, it’s more like comparing apples with excavation machines or pears with zebras. We aren’t the same as other people. They aren’t the same as us. There is no comparison. 

Not only is it deeply unhealthy, it is also deeply disobedient, as we saw in a previous study: 

Exodus 20:17 NIV 

[17] “You shall not covet your neighbor’s house. You shall not covet your neighbor’s wife, or his male or female servant, his ox or donkey, or anything that belongs to your neighbor.” 

(Read the full passage at: https://bible.com/bible/111/exo.20.17.NIV)

If we truly love ourselves, we will set aside the temptation to compare ourselves with people who are not us and will instead concentrate on our own walk with God. We will follow Him, without being distracted by other people: how they are doing or what they are doing. 

We have already seen that all sin – no matter what it is – stems from a failure to love. What Peter did on that fateful evening in the High Priest's courtyard didn’t just come from a desire for self-preservation. It also came from a failure to love Jesus sufficiently to remain loyal to Him in His darkest hour. 

It should come as no surprise, then, that the solution to his sin was to repent and love: God, his neighbours and himself. 

When we fail God – and there is no-one who doesn’t – the route back for us is precisely the same. It begins with love. It continues with repentance. Then growth. Then heaven. 

And that is a route every one of us should want to take. 

 

Conclusion  

John 8:10-11 NIV 

[10] Jesus straightened up and asked her, “Woman, where are they? Has no one condemned you?” [11]  “No one, sir,” she said. “Then neither do I condemn you,” Jesus declared. “Go now and leave your life of sin.” 

(Read the full passage at: https://bible.com/bible/111/jhn.8.10-11.NIV)

We started thus long journey thirty-one studies ago. There we hit on the basic principle behind all obedience and discipleship; the heartbeat of all evangelism, the fuel of all mission, the drive of all ministry. 

And yet the forgotten principle that those who wish to use religion as a veneer of respectability for their hatred have long abandoned. 

That principle is love: love for God, love for our neighbours, love for ourselves. 

We have seen in these posts that love is like the rings of a tree: if you slice through Biblical Christianity, you will find it running all the way through. It is the very substance of everything that makes us Christians. Without it, our faith is nothing but a sham and we are nothing but religious fakes. 

The Ten Commandments – indeed, all of Old Testament law – is built on it. The great prophets and teachers taught it. Jesus lived it. The apostles wrote about it. 

And we must obey it. 

The world has more than enough fakes and frauds and fools. If we truly love the Lord our God, we will not want His Name to be attached to anything like that. 

Instead, let’s set aside our petty envy and competitiveness and strife. 

Let’s love one another. 

Because love speaks louder than words. 

Prayer 

Lord Jesus, I thank You for the gentle, loving way You restored Peter. I confess that I need to be restored. I have not loved You, my neighbours or myself as I ought. I know this is sin. I want to out it right. Today I choose to love like You. Show me how. Amen. 

Questions for Contemplation  

• What had Peter done that was so wrong? What was at the root of this sin, and our sin? 

• How did Jesus restore Peter? What was special about how He did it? 

• What will you change as a result of this study and this series to show how much you love God, your neighbour and yourself?