Psalms 130:6 NIVUK
[6] I wait for the Lord more than watchmen wait for the morning, more than watchmen wait for the morning.
‘I’m free to do what I want any old time.’ So sang the Rolling Stones in 1965 (memorably covered by Scottish rock band The Soup Dragons in 1990).
And do you know something that might surprise you?
The Bible agrees.
With one seriously major caveat:
There may well be consequences.
1 Corinthians 6:12 NIVUK
[12] ‘I have the right to do anything,’ you say – but not everything is beneficial. ‘I have the right to do anything’ – but I will not be mastered by anything.
Galatians 5:1 NIVUK
[1] It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Stand firm, then, and do not let yourselves be burdened again by a yoke of slavery.
Sin has consequences. We can exercise that freedom, but we will also have to live with the consequences that follow.
And one of these is in this Psalm, and described in dark detail:
Despair.
That is what is meant in verse 1:
Psalms 130:1 NIVUK
[1] Out of the depths I cry to you, Lord;
Now, we have to understand this correctly. This is not necessarily despair at getting found out. That was that David clearly felt in Psalm 51.
Neither is it the despair we feel when the consequences of our sin are catching up with us. That was the despair Saul felt in 1 Samuel 31, and we also saw David grapple with in Psalm 3.
No, this is simply the despair of knowing that, whether or not you are found out and whether or not you will face the consequences of your actions, you have still done the wrong thing.
It is this despair that drove Judas to take his own life (Matthew 27:1-5; Acts 1:18).
So we are in very serious territory indeed.
Despair over sin is not necessarily a bad thing. It all depends on what we do with it.
In 1993, the Welsh rock band the Manic Street Preachers (who were anything but Christians) released a song called ‘From Despair to Where?’. Like so many of their peers, they used the song to adequately describe the sheer sense of meaninglessness and loss that so many other people felt at the time, but they offered no hope, because they did not believe there was any.
And that is so, so dangerous.
Paul framed things a lot differently:
2 Corinthians 7:10 NIVUK
[10] Godly sorrow brings repentance that leads to salvation and leaves no regret, but worldly sorrow brings death.
Understand this: if you despair at your life and the choices you made and wish you could change it, that is no bad thing. But you must know that there is a way out of despair, and that is to bring it to God.
If you choose to live in despair, the truth is that you are not truly living and might not live much longer.
But if you bring that despair to God, you will find your way out of it.
There are three phases of the journey here from despair to God’s care.
The first of these is the Depths of Sinfulness:
Psalms 130:1-3 NIVUK
[1] Out of the depths I cry to you, Lord; [2] Lord, hear my voice. Let your ears be attentive to my cry for mercy. [3] If you, Lord, kept a record of sins, Lord, who could stand?
Psalms 130:7-8 NIVUK
[7] Israel, put your hope in the Lord, for with the Lord is unfailing love and with him is full redemption. [8] He himself will redeem Israel from all their sins.
Right away, before we go any further, we must recognise the core truth behind this Psalm: that for anyone with any kind of conscience, sin brings despair.
There are those to whom it does not, but we would not want to count ourselves among them. Theirs might seem like a much happier life, but it is not without consequences. Their serial disobedience has simply led them to be so far from God that their hearts are hardened to His prompting. They have been given over to the consequences of their sin – which will, one day, be eternal (Romans 1:21-32).
If we feel despair when we sin – at what we have done (probably again), this is a good thing. It is a prompt from our conscience telling us that we have crossed a line.
So yes, this Psalmist is plumbing the absolute depths of despair because of his own sin. And that is bad. It goes without saying. He shouldn’t have done it.
But at the same time, it is good, because without that despair he would not be aware of what he has done and the meaninglessness and purposelessness of it and want to change.
Paul knew this himself – and not just in theory, but personally:
Romans 7:14-25 NIVUK
[14] We know that the law is spiritual; but I am unspiritual, sold as a slave to sin. [15] I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do I do not do, but what I hate I do. [16] And if I do what I do not want to do, I agree that the law is good. [17] As it is, it is no longer I myself who do it, but it is sin living in me. [18] For I know that good itself does not dwell in me, that is, in my sinful nature. For I have the desire to do what is good, but I cannot carry it out. [19] For I do not do the good I want to do, but the evil I do not want to do – this I keep on doing. [20] Now if I do what I do not want to do, it is no longer I who do it, but it is sin living in me that does it. [21] So I find this law at work: although I want to do good, evil is right there with me. [22] For in my inner being I delight in God’s law; [23] but I see another law at work in me, waging war against the law of my mind and making me a prisoner of the law of sin at work within me. [24] What a wretched man I am! Who will rescue me from this body that is subject to death? [25] Thanks be to God, who delivers me through Jesus Christ our Lord! So then, I myself in my mind am a slave to God’s law, but in my sinful nature a slave to the law of sin.
Paul’s experience here is common to many of us. We start out with the right intentions. Our heart is truly in the right place. But we get it wrong. We sin. We make mistakes. And our heart is heavy with sorrow. And disappointment with ourselves. And grief. And despair.
But then we come across this very precious verse:
Matthew 5:4 NIVUK
[4] Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted.
Why is that?
Because it is in our disappointment and despair that we recognise the sheer ugliness of sin. It repulses us. We no longer want to do it. It changes our desires.
Sin might smell sweet, but despair that we have done it again makes us realise that it stinks, and this revulsion makes us repent of it.
No-one really knows what the Psalmist has done or how far he and the people of Israel have sunk. They were certainly past masters at sinning, and not always so quick to repent.
But what this shows us is the right response to despair when it strikes: confess it to God.
Deal with the root cause of it. Repent of the sin that led to it. Be disgusted by it.
And then the despair will leave.
Because after the depths of sin, we also see the Desire for Forgiveness:
Psalms 130:3-4 NIVUK
[3] If you, Lord, kept a record of sins, Lord, who could stand? [4] But with you there is forgiveness, so that we can, with reverence, serve you.
Now here is something really quite remarkable, because later on in the Bible it tells us quite clearly that God does keep a record of our sins:
Revelation 20:12-13 NIVUK
[12] And I saw the dead, great and small, standing before the throne, and books were opened. Another book was opened, which is the book of life. The dead were judged according to what they had done as recorded in the books. [13] The sea gave up the dead that were in it, and death and Hades gave up the dead that were in them, and each person was judged according to what they had done.
And the reality is that the Psalmist is correct: because there is a record of our sins we cannot stand before God. That is the reality of our situation – and one we are completely powerless to change on our own.
But...
Romans 6:23 NIVUK
[23] For the wages of sin is death, but the gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord.
Romans 3:23-24 NIVUK
[23] for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God, [24] and all are justified freely by his grace through the redemption that came by Christ Jesus.
What makes the difference is not that there us no record of sin – if there was no such thing then there would be no justice – but that it is nullified by the record of grace:
Colossians 2:13-15 NIVUK
[13] When you were dead in your sins and in the uncircumcision of your flesh, God made you alive with Christ. He forgave us all our sins, [14] having cancelled the charge of our legal indebtedness, which stood against us and condemned us; he has taken it away, nailing it to the cross. [15] And having disarmed the powers and authorities, he made a public spectacle of them, triumphing over them by the cross.
The forgiveness we seek – and ao desperately need – is found, and can only be found, in Jesus.
As I said before, sin brings despair – the despair of knowing that our life can be better but, like a child staring through the window of a closed candy store, it just feels so far from us.
The only way that despair can be dealt with is if it turns into a desire for forgiveness – a longing for our sin to be dealt with once and for all.
But the third phase of the journey is the one few people take, but those who do find a rich blessing – Dependency on Faithfulness:
Psalms 130:5-8 NIVUK
[5] I wait for the Lord, my whole being waits, and in his word I put my hope. [6] I wait for the Lord more than watchmen wait for the morning, more than watchmen wait for the morning. [7] Israel, put your hope in the Lord, for with the Lord is unfailing love and with him is full redemption. [8] He himself will redeem Israel from all their sins.
As we have seen, the work of a watchman was difficult, dangerous, under-appreciated and not a job that many of us would deliberately choose to do. We can absolutely understand why they would long for the morning, when the light would make it much easier to do their job and reduce the deadly risk to which they were exposed.
The Psalmist compares their longing to an end of their perilous shift to his longing for God to show up in his situation.
He sees in the Lord three positive things that encourage him, despite one particular thing that should not, and this is what lifts him put of despair.
The first of these is hope.
We don’t often talk of hope the way the Bible does. I recently went to London, around four hundred miles from home, for a business event. I hoped that my train connections would all work. They didn’t on the way south – I was an hour late in arriving. They did on my return home – I stepped off one train and less than ten minutes later I was on board the other one.
We say we are ‘hoping’ for something because we are optimistic that it might, but we have no guarantee that it will.
The Bible has this type of hope in it (see Romans 13:24 or 3 John 1:14 for examples).
However, it also has a different type of hope:
Romans 5:5 NIVUK
[5] And hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured out into our hearts through the Holy Spirit, who has been given to us.
Hebrews 6:17-20 NIVUK
[17] Because God wanted to make the unchanging nature of his purpose very clear to the heirs of what was promised, he confirmed it with an oath. [18] God did this so that, by two unchangeable things in which it is impossible for God to lie, we who have fled to take hold of the hope set before us may be greatly encouraged. [19] We have this hope as an anchor for the soul, firm and secure. It enters the inner sanctuary behind the curtain, [20] where our forerunner, Jesus, has entered on our behalf. He has become a high priest for ever, in the order of Melchizedek.
This is a hope to which we can fully entrust ourselves.
So while the former is a hope that the weather will be good, or public transport will work, or a certain person will not let us down, the latter is something rock solid, like the ground beneath our feet. Or in God’s case, even more than that. Hope is the act of entrusting this rock solid, never failing thing with your life.
That is why, while struggling with the depths of sin to which the Psalmist and his people have reached, he encourages them to put their hope in the Lord and the promises of His Word.
Apart from hope, the second is love – and not just any love, but unfailing love: God’s unfailing love.
This is the love that saves us:
1 John 4:9-10 NIVUK
[9] This is how God showed his love among us: he sent his one and only Son into the world that we might live through him. [10] This is love: not that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son as an atoning sacrifice for our sins.
John 3:16-17 NIVUK
[16] For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life. [17] For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through him.
The reason that we can have hope that will bring us out of despair is not that we are worthy or skilled or brilliant, but because God loved us, even though we are unworthy, often unskilled and sometimes downright stupid. It is that love that drives God to come to our aid, not any position or name or power we mat hold.
When we hope in God to save us from self-inflicted despair – and, make no bones about it, when we experience despair caused by sin it is completely self-inflicted – then we are placing our hopes in God’s love for us.
And there is no greater force in all the universe in which to place our hope:
Romans 8:35-39 NIVUK
[35] Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall trouble or hardship or persecution or famine or nakedness or danger or sword? [36] As it is written: ‘For your sake we face death all day long; we are considered as sheep to be slaughtered.’ [37] No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. [38] For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, [39] neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.
Apart from hope and love, the Psalmist sees redemption.
This is a word that is often mentioned in Christian circles. Songs have been written about it.
However, its meaning has largely been lost.
The most incredible demonstration of what it really means is in the book of Hosea, where Hosea, a priest, has married an unfaithful woman as an example of how God shows love to His undeserving people. She is captured, trafficked and sold into slavery because of her behaviour. This is what follows:
Hosea 3:1-3 NIVUK
[1] The Lord said to me, ‘Go, show your love to your wife again, though she is loved by another man and is an adulteress. Love her as the Lord loves the Israelites, though they turn to other gods and love the sacred raisin cakes.’ [2] So I bought her for fifteen shekels of silver and about a homer and a lethek of barley. [3] Then I told her, ‘You are to live with me for many days; you must not be a prostitute or be intimate with any man, and I will behave the same way towards you.’
So when the Bible talks of redemption it talks of a people who are enslaved by their own sin and are utterly incapable of getting themselves out of it. Hence Paul’s declaration in Romans 7:
Romans 7:24 NIVUK
[24] What a wretched man I am! Who will rescue me from this body that is subject to death?
We need to understand this Psalm correctly. By saying that God will redeem Israel from their sins, the Psalmist is saying that Israel is getting what it deserves, that Israel is captive to its own sin, that Israel is utterly powerless to change this situation and that Israel needs God to step in and save it.
If ever there was an illustration of why it is that sin causes despair, this is it.
But the beauty of this Psalm is that God will redeem, because God loves, and this gives the Psalmist hope.
And it is this hope, this complete trust in God’s faithfulness to His undeserving people, that brings the Psalmist up from the depths of His misery and despair.
Scottish (non-Christian) songwriter Justin Currie wrote these telling words about an ill-fated love affair:
‘And I won’t pretend
That I’m the Saviour of the innocent and bad
But put to withered old blooms in a couple of rooms
And they’ll behave like lunatics and crave what makes them sad’
Isn’t that just the way? We often behave like lunatics and crave what makes us sad.
Often, when our lives seem to not measure up and we feel despair, we are very quickly to pass the blame onto other people. ‘It’s my parents’ fault’ we say. ‘Or my teachers’, or my neighbourhood’s, or my peers’, or the government’s. It’s not mine.’
I need to be tough here. Uncompromising.
If you are in despair because of your sin then you are to blame.
You.
No-one else.
And until you realise that and take responsibility for it, your despair will not go away.
That is just how life is.
That is why we see the following verses in 1 John:
1 John 1:8-10 NIVUK
[8] If we claim to be without sin, we deceive ourselves and the truth is not in us. [9] If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness. [10] If we claim we have not sinned, we make him out to be a liar and his word is not in us.
So first and foremost, if we find ourselves in the depths of despair, just like the Psalmist, we need to have an equally deep desire for forgiveness that drives us to God and makes us strive to be at peace with those we have hurt. We must depend on God’s faithfulness to life us our of the mess we are in and restore us.
I have spent a lot of time – perhaps too much – around those who feel that their life is a mess and nothing will ever change.
That is just not true.
It can.
But only when we seek God’s forgiveness and put our trust in Him.
Prayer
Lord Jesus, I am done with the despair caused by sin. I come to You now to seek your forgiveness. I put my faith and trust in You. Help me to live a life that pleases You. Guide me out of my despair, I pray. Amen.
Questions
1. What caused the psalmist to despair? Does it do the same for us?
2. Why do you think forgiveness is the way out of despair?
3. What hope does God give us that He can and will take our despair from us?
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